Just a Pretty Face

The other day at work I had a meeting and one of the people in the meeting was a very pretty young girl who just recently earned her engineering license. The conversation turned to congratulating her on her recent achievement and I of course noted that she is more than just another pretty face. There are some real brains behind all that beauty. I should have gotten the crap beat out of me for such a comment but she took it well and of course we transitioned right into talking about poker.

The basis for the discussion was how people are judged based upon outward appearance. She was asking me if her looks hurt or help her at the poker table. I thought about it some and told her she needed to use it as a weapon and understand how to benefit from her looks.

She surprised me with the fact that she usually tries to dress down and subdue her looks any time she is going out to play poker. Primarily she hates all the attention she gets in the poker room. In her opinion, the men in the poker room are pigs and very rude. The primary issue seems to be constant staring, leering and gawking. I have probably been guilty of this myself a few times.

Staring deeply into her cleavage I asked, “What poker face?”

“Up, up higher, right there, there is where you look when you talk to me.”

Because I have never been the most beautiful one at the table I have never had to use my good looks to my advantage at the poker table. I remember reading a few articles over the years and I have some experience playing with a couple of super hot girls so I tried to give away a few basic ideas of how to maximize your assets.

The bottom line is you need to be able to put yourself in your opponents’ seat and see what he does when he looks at you. What assumptions are they making about you based upon your appearance? How will they play against you based upon those appearances? How can I reinforce those assumptions? How can I exploit the assumptions my opponent has made?

I like to write about pretty women way more than I do about middle aged white guys, unless of course I am writing about myself, so I will share a few tips for my pretty young female reader. Yes I meant for that to be singular. If I have a second pretty reader please let me know and send pictures.

First I must really ask you to dress up and look your best when you come to the poker room. A little self serving but you will also benefit. This is an asset and you need to use it. Play to your strengths and shy away from your weakness.

Second, you need to turn up the flirting and try to chat about things other than poker. Claim to be there by yourself or with the girls. Your story should be that you are just out to have a good time and your friend wanted to play poker. You are just along having a good time and really do not play much poker mostly at home with friends. Try to notice who is interested and playing along with your story; yes I mean the creep trying to get into your pants. You will want to play pots against this guy and exploit him.

Third, you have to understand that the pretty girl gets called by everyone. People will give you chips for little or no reason. Do not bluff unless you are absolutely sure the guy is totally enamored with you and you can sweet talk him out of the pot. I would almost make the rule do not bluff. You also need to over bet your hand when you have a strong hand. Players are going to call much bigger bets against you. You can also call less than other people because good players rarely bluff pretty girls. When you fold you can turn on the charm and ask them to show you what they had and this will work.

Fourth, play shorter sessions and use a hit and run strategy. You will wear out your welcome after a few hours if you are playing far better than you look. So keep it fresh and bounce around from table to table and casino to casino. If you are in Las Vegas for a week, play a different poker room every night. Once players know they can not get in your pants and they are not going to get your chips they will begin to treat you as just another player. I call that the Jennifer Harmon phenomenon.

Guys please beware, if any of you made it this far, that the cute girl that just joined the poker game may be more than just another pretty face.


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